Comfort zones

Your comfort zone is not static. It is either expanding or shrinking.

I was thirteen, he was twelve. We were sitting on a stone wall, overlooking a field where people were walking along a path.

I’m in a box, and you’re in a box, he was saying, and one of us needs to step outside their box. I agreed with him. Neither of us moved.

The topic at hand? Kissing.

Eventually there was a first innocent kiss, and then a second. And within a few days, it was really quite easy to lean over and kiss my first “real” boyfriend. (Needless to say, a few days later our relationship dissolved peacefully and we went our separate ways.)

The one mistake we make? We stay inside their comfort zone!

Perhaps we add flowers to the corner where the ceiling is quite low, and we add a new coat of paint. But the truth remains: we’re settling for less than we deserve because we’re afraid of leaving our comfort zone.

What I learned from that experience is that:

  • it takes no small act of courage to step outside our comfort zone, whether it’s committing to our health, admitting we need help or leaving an unhealthy situation
  • from inside the comfort zone, the leap looks immense and impossible; from outside the comfort zone, we feel empowered and invincible
  • even a timid step outside the comfort zone is worthy of celebration!
  • that first step never becomes easier with time, in fact, the confines of the comfort zone begin to feel like home and then the walls start shrinking
  • a comfort zone is an illusion, one that keeps us from great kisses–er, I mean great experiences in life
  • we are always meant to grow: as babies, we started rolling, we started crawling, eventually we began walking and then running. All those took an act of courage, and stepping outside of our comfort zone.

What is one thing you can do to step from your comfort zone today?